Issue 41

Redneck Ramblins

I know how to fix the North Korea deal. Send Obama, Biden, Pelosi, and all of Congress over there until it is resolved. Then they can go to Iran.
If North Korea fires on Hawaii on July 4^th, I reckon’ we ought to show them what fireworks we got!
Why is it when a bug decides to commit suicide against your windshield, it always hits right in your line of sight and always one exit since you cleaned it?
Okay, we will have regulators overseeing the financial sector. Who will regulate the regulators?
All of the special interest groups have become so polarizing that they have lost effectiveness. NRA, PETA, Sierra Club – what happened to common sense and rational behavior?
At least they can’t say that Obama wouldn’t hurt a fly!
Go, Pelosi, go – and take Boxer with you.
Naps are nice.
Wow! What an exciting US Open. I was nervous in the last round and I wasn’t playing. Imagine the pressure on those guys.
Gas is going up and the stock market is going down. They used to blame it all on Bush. Who do we blame now?
I am very fortunate that I had a great dad and two great kids. Thanks for a great Father’s Day!

You Can’t Make This Stuff Up

Jun 19, 9:33 PM (ET)

JEFFERSONVILLE, Ind. (AP) – An Indiana lawyer who was found asleep headfirst in a neighbor’s trash can after a night of drinking has apologized and says he’s embarrassed. No charges have been filed against Larry Wilder, who is the Jeffersonville City Council’s attorney.

Wilder said he had dinner and drinks with friends in nearby Louisville, Ky., on Tuesday night. He said he was driven home in a client’s limousine but remembers little that happened after that.

A neighbor found Wilder in the trash can early Wednesday and called police, who helped Wilder home.

Jeffersonville Police Chief Tim Deeringer said no crime was committed and that Wilder was cooperative and not a threat to anyone.

The City Council president said she will call a special meeting next week to discuss Wilder’s status with the city.

Redneck Joke of the Week

A woman went down to the Welfare Office to get aid. The office worker asked her, “How many children do you have?”

“Ten,” she replied.

“What are their names?” he asked.

“David, David, David, David, David, David, David, David, David and David,” she answered.

“They’re all named David?” he asked “What if you want them to come in from playing outside?”

“Oh, that’s easy,” she said. “I just call ‘David,’ and they all come running in.”

“And, if you want them to come to the table for dinner?”

“I just say, ‘David, come eat your dinner’,” she answered.

“But what if you just want ONE of them to do something?” he asked.

“Oh, that’s easy,” she said. “I just use their last name!”

Redneck Picture of the Week

Grilling Season is Now Open

pistol bbq

Racin’

Kasey Kahne got the King his first victory in 10 years by winning at Sonoma.

It is off to New Hampshire this week: Picks:

Matt Kenseth
Mark Martin
Denny Hamlin

Ain’t True

LITTLE ROCK, Ark.

Arkansas State Police say a tractor-trailer rig hauling pigs overturned early Monday on a major highway and some of the four-legged hogs got loose.

The wreck and the roaming porkers closed a stretch of Interstate 430 connecting Little Rock to North Little Rock.

State Police spokesman Bill Sadler said morning commuters were detoured around the area as troopers and others tried to corral the escaped hogs.

The swine could weigh as much as 800 pounds each.

Authorities said the truck was carrying about 90 hogs. Some of them remained in the trailer while others made a break for freedom.

Ain’t true that hogs on the highway are always motorcycles.

Redneck Song of the Week:

Alan Jackson – “Summertime Blues”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qy7eWTaAjfA&feature=channel

Redneck Video of the Week:

Congressman Forbes asks the questions “Did America ever consider itself a Judeo-Christian nation?” and “If America was once a Judeo-Christian nation, when did it cease to be?”