Issue 69

Redneck Ramblins

• The Designated Driver program just turned 21. Does that mean it can drink now?
• If Congress wants to pass a bill, here is one. There shall be no blue football fields. The Humanitarian Bowl is played in Idaho on that dang blue field. The game was almost unwatchable until it snowed a bit and muted some of the blue. There is no such thing as blue grass. Yea, there is bluegrass in Kentucky, but it is still greenish. Glad I did watch –great game especially the finish.
• Note to Mike Leach – The boss is the boss. Insubordination is never a good play call.
• The talking heads on all the sports shows are missing the point of Leach’s firing. They are saying it was because he abused a player. He got fired for his lack of smarts in dealing with the administration.
• Obama and Rush both vacationing in Hawaii at the same time? Is that little state big enough for both of their egos?
• Bubba likes to recycle. He plans to do his best to recycle everybody in Washington at each election.
• Still can’t believe that the Senate gave us the Christmas present of the Affordable Healthcare Act. Nobody still understands what’s in the bill, but they voted on it. Unbelievable and unforgivable.
• These are the times that try men’s souls.
• Hoping that 2010 is the best that’s ever been.

You Can’t Make This Stuff Up

Funeral home offers drunk drivers a free burial

The Associated Press

ROME, Ga. — Planning to drink and drive this New Year’s? A north Georgia funeral home has a deal for you. Between now and noon Thursday, drivers can visit McGuire, Jennings and Miller Funeral Home in Rome to sign a contract stating they plan to drink or take drugs and then drive on New Year’s Eve. If they die in a wreck that day, the funeral home will give them a free burial.

Services included in the package are a casket, grave, limousine and preparation of remains.

Funeral home officials said the program is designed to save lives by making partygoers think twice about drinking and driving.

Headlines

Americans most admire Obama, Clinton, Palin

I most admire our soldiers, teachers, preachers, nurses – people that make a difference instead of a fortune.

Reports: Wizard’s Arenas, teammate pull guns in dispute

This supposedly happened at the Verizon Center in DC. Therefore it could not have happened, because you cannot have guns in DC. They must have just misunderstood the term shoot around.

East Coast Faces Deep Freeze; Florida Oranges Threatened…
Cold, Colder, Coldest
Iowa temps ‘a solid 30 degrees below normal’…
Peru’s mountain people ‘face extinction because of cold conditions’…
Beijing — coldest in 40 years…
World copes with Arctic weather…

Are you sure we don’t have a global cooling problem?

Elton John Helping Eminem With Drug Abuse Problem

What? Is he buying the drugs or helping him abuse them?

Redneck Joke of the Week

My dog sleeps about 20 hours a day.  She has her food prepared for her.  She can eat whenever she wants, 24/7/365.  Her meals are provided at no cost to her.  She visits the doctor once a year for her checkup, and again during the year if any medical needs arise.  For this she pays nothing and nothing is required of her.  She lives in a nice neighborhood in a house that is much larger than she needs, but she is not required to do any upkeep.  If she makes a mess, someone else cleans it up.  She has her choice of luxurious places to sleep. She receives these accommodations absolutely free.  She is living like a queen, and has absolutely no expenses whatsoever.  All of her costs are picked up by others who go out and earn a living every day.

I was just thinking about all this, and suddenly it hit me like a brick in the head…. My dog is a Democrat !

Redneck Picture of the Week

Sign in Rockwall, Texas

Racin’

Just 6 more weeks until the Daytona 500!

Ain’t True

MOUNT CLEMENS, Mich. — Taking a bite out of crime has never been so bland at a southeast Michigan jail.

Failing freezers have forced Macomb County Jail inmates to forgo warm meals in favor of an endless stream of bologna and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

Sheriff’s officials said Wednesday that mold was spotted last month in the jail’s 50-year-old freezers. But with no money for replacements, the sandwich diets may continue through early next year.

The Detroit Free Press reports that county officials warned commissioners as early as 2005 that the freezers needed to be replaced. Officials next month plan to ask commissioners for emergency funds to buy new refrigerators.

Ain’t  true that Yankees is all that smart. It is below freezing in Michigan this time of year. Just put the food outside. Problem solved.

Redneck Song of the Week:

“Wild-Eyed Southern Boys” – 38 Special

Redneck Video of the Week:

Congressional Candidate Lieutenant Colonel Allen West

Redneck Education Tip of the Week:

U. S. Oil Discovery- Largest Reserve in the World

About 6 months ago, a writer was watching a news program on oil and one of the Forbes Bros. was the guest.. The host said to Forbes, “I am going to ask you a direct question and I would like a direct answer; how much oil does the U.S.  have in the ground?”  Forbes did not miss a beat, he said, “more than all the Middle East put together.”  Please read below.

The U. S. Geological Service issued a report in April 2008 that only scientists and oil men knew was coming, but man was it big.  It was a revised report (hadn’t been updated since 1995) on how much oil was in this area of the western 2/3 of North Dakota, western South Dakota, and extreme eastern Montana ….. check THIS out:

The Bakken is the largest domestic oil discovery since Alaska ’s Prudhoe Bay , and has the potential to eliminate all American dependence on foreign oil. The Energy Information Administration (EIA) estimates it at 503 billion barrels. Even if just 10% of the oil is recoverable… at $107 a barrel, we’re looking at a resource base worth more than $5.3 trillion.

“When I first briefed legislators on this, you could practically see their jaws hit the floor. They had no idea.” says Terry Johnson, the Montana Legislature’s financial analyst.

“This sizable find is now the highest-producing onshore oil field found in the past 56 years,” reports The Pittsburgh Post Gazette.  It’s a formation known as the Williston   Basin, but is more commonly referred to as the ‘Bakken.’  It stretches from Northern Montana, through North Dakota and into Canada.  For years, U. S.  oil exploration has been considered a dead end.  Even the ‘Big Oil’ companies gave up searching for major oil wells decades ago. However, a recent technological breakthrough has opened up the Bakken’s massive reserves….. and we now have access of up to 500 billion barrels.  And because this is light, sweet oil, those billions of barrels will cost Americans just $16 PER BARREL!

That’s enough crude to fully fuel the American economy for 2041 years straight.  And if THAT didn’t throw you on the floor, then this next one should – because it’s from 2006!

Stansberry Report Online – 4/20/2006

Hidden 1,000 feet beneath the surface of the Rocky Mountains lies the largest untapped oil reserve in the world. It is more than 2 TRILLION barrels.  On August 8, 2005 President Bush mandated its extraction. In three and a half years of high oil prices none has been extracted. With this mother load of oil why are we still fighting over off-shore drilling?

They reported this stunning news:  We have more oil inside our borders, than all the other proven reserves on earth. Here are the official estimates:

- 8-times as much oil as Saudi Arabia

- 18-times as much oil as Iraq

-21-times as much oil as Kuwait

- 22-times as much oil as Iran

- 500-times as much oil as Yemen

- and it’s all right here in the Western United States  .

HOW can this BE? HOW can we NOT BE extracting this? Because the environmentalists and others have blocked all efforts to help America become ndependent of foreign oil! Again, we are letting a small group of people dictate our lives and our economy…..WHY?

James Bartis, lead researcher with the study says we’ve got more oil in this very compact area than the entire Middle East -more than 2 TRILLION barrels untapped.  That’s more than all the proven oil reserves of crude oil in the world today, reports The Denver Post.

Don’t think ‘OPEC’ will drop its price – even with this find?  Think again!  It’s all about the competitive marketplace, – it has to. Think OPEC just might be funding the environmentalists?

Got your attention yet?  Now, while you’re thinking about it, do this:

Pass this along.   If you don’t take a little time to do this, then you should stifle yourself the next time you complain about gas prices – by doing NOTHING, you forfeit your right to complain.

Now I just wonder what would happen in this country if every one of you sent this to every one in your address book.

By the way…this is all true. Check it out at the link below!!!

GOOGLE it, or follow this link.  It will blow your mind.

http://www.usgs.gov/newsroom/article.asp?ID=1911

Football Pickins:

Louie’s Losers

Boise State loses to TCU

Fiesta Bowl

Iowa loses to GA Tech

Orange Bowl

Central Michigan loses to Troy

GMAC Bowl

Texas loses to Bama

BcS National Championship

Redneck Rebel Quote of the Week:

“You reach a point where you don’t work for money.”
- Walt Disney